Too Many Piercings

Here's a guy with High Self Esteem!

Teddy Suicide

So Sad!

Lost Dog, Found Dog, Yummy Dog

They found your dog, they found him delicious!

Can I Recommend A Builder?

Personal Service Device

Do you want one? OMG!!

Feeling Depressed

I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline.

Got a call center in Pakistan .
I told them I was suicidal.

They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.....

Look At Me

Look at me, I want attention, my Father didn't hug me enough.

I love the internet, so many crazy people for me to laugh at!

Tasty

Looks tasty! A quick breakfast for the lady who's late for work.

Big Sneeze

My, what a big sneeze! I think this calls for three tissues.

Peter Griffin Sex Change

Have you ever wondered what Peter Griffin would look like after a sex change?

Wonder no more!

BEFORE:



AFTER:

Homeless Sleeping

Already Registered

How could you believe that this email address is already registered?

Then again, great minds think alike!

Don't Use Your Pillow

A Tale of Revenge

A little boy about 12 years old is walking down the street dragging a flattened frog on a string behind him. He came up to the doorstep of "a house of ill repute" and knocked on the door.

When the Madam answered it, she saw the little boy and asked what he wanted.

He said, "I want to have sex with one of the women inside. I have the money to buy it, and I'm not leaving until I get it.

The Madam figured, why not, so she told him to come in. Once in, she told him to pick any of the girls he liked. He asked, "Do any of the girls have any diseases?"

Of course the Madam said "No".

The boy said, "I heard all the men talking about having to get shots after making love with Amber - THAT'S the girl I want."

Since the little boy was so adamant and had the money to pay for it, the Madam told him to go to the first room on the right.

He headed down the hall dragging the squashed frog behind him. Ten minutes later he came back, still dragging the frog, paid the Madam, and headed out the door.

The Madam stopped him and asked, "Why did you pick the only girl in the place with a disease, instead of one of the others?"

He said, "Well, if you must know, tonight when I get home, my parents are going out to a restaurant to eat, leaving me at home with a baby-sitter. After they leave, my baby-sitter will have sex with me because she just happens to be very fond of cute little boys.

She will then get the disease that I just caught. When Mum and Dad get back, Dad will take the baby-sitter home. On the way, he'll give her one in the car and he'll catch the disease.

Then when Dad gets home from the baby-sitter's, he and Mum will go to bed and have sex, and Mum will catch it.

In the morning when Dad goes to work, the Milkman will deliver the milk, have a quickie with Mum and catch the disease ... and HE'S the bastard who ran over my FROG!"

A Wedding Secret

A couple were lying in bed together on the morning of their tenth wedding anniversary when the wife says "Darling, as this is such a special occasion I think that it is time I made a confession. Before we were married I was a hooker for eight years"

The husband ponders for a moment and then looks into his wife's eyes and says "My love, you have been a perfect wife for ten years, I cannot hold your past against you, in fact maybe you could show me a few tricks of the trade and spice up our sex life a bit"

She said "I don't think you understand, my name was Brian and I played for Wigan!"

Sick

A deformed and ugly man walks into his local pub with a big grin on his
face.

" What are you so happy about?" asks the barman.

" I'll tell you," replies the ugly man. "You know, I live by the
railway. Well, on my way home last night, I noticed a young woman tied
to the tracks, like in the movies. I, of course, went and cut her free
and took her back to my place. " Anyway, to make a long story short, I
scored big time! We made love all night, all over the house. We did
everything, me on top,
sometimes her on top, every position imaginable!"

" Fantastic!" exclaimed the barman. "You lucky guy. Was she pretty?"

" Dunno...never found the head."