North Korean Soldiers

Punishment

A US Air Force C-141 is scheduled to leave Thule Air Base, Greenland at midnight.

During the pilot's preflight check, he discovers the latrine holding tank is still full from the last flight.

A message is sent to the base and an off-duty airman is called to take care of it.

The young man finally gets to the base and makes his way to the aircraft, only to find the latrine pump truck has been left outdoors and is frozen solid, so he must find another one in the hangar, which takes even more time.

He returns to the aircraft and is less than enthusiastic about what he has to do.

Nevertheless, he goes about the job carefully (and slowly) so as not to risk criticism later.

As he's leaving, the pilot stops him and says, "Son, your attitude and performance has caused this flight to be late and I'm going to see to it that you are not just reprimanded but punished."

Shivering in the cold, his task finished, he takes a deep breath, stands tall and says, "Sir, with all due respect, I'm not your son; I'm an Airman in the US Air Force.

I've been in Thule, Greenland, for 11 months without any leave, and reindeer's asses are beginning to look good to me.

I have one stripe; it's two-thirty in the morning, the temperature is 40 below zero, and my job is to pump shit out of an aircraft.

Exactly what form of punishment did you have in mind?"

Military Time

A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by
a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young,
idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major
for conversation.

Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is
something bothering you?

Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature.

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, It looks
like you have seen a lot of action.

Yes, ma'am, a lot of action.

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, You
know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself.

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, You know, I hope you don't take this the
wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?

1955, ma'am.

Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking
everything so seriously! I mean, no sex since 1955! She took his hand and
led him to a private room where she proceeded to relax him several times.

Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said,
Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955!

The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his matter-of-fact
voice, I hope not, it's only 2130 now.

(Don't ya just love military time?!)