Showing posts with label Polish. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Polish. Show all posts

Thursday, 6 December 2007

Polish Divorce

A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although
His English was far from perfect, they got along very well until one day
He rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a
Divorce for him. The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend
On the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

L: Have you any grounds?
P: Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.

L: No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
P: It made of concrete.

L: I don't think you understand. Does either of you have a real
Grudge?
P: No, we have carport, and not need one.

L: I mean. What are your relations like?
P: All my relations still in Poland .

L: Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
P: We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.

L: Does your wife beat you up?
P: No, I always up before her.

L: Is your wife a nagger?
P: No, she white.

L: Why do you want this divorce?
P: She going to kill me.

L: What makes you think that?
P: I got proof.

L: What kind of proof?
P: She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on
Shelf in bathroom. I can read, and it say: Polish Remover.

Saturday, 22 September 2007

Polish Sausage

Polish Sausage

Everyone is in a hurry to scream "racism" these days!

A man asks: "In what aisle will I find the Polish sausage?", The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?"

The guy (clearly offended) says, "Well, yes I am. But let me ask you, something.

If I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a Taco would you ask if I were Mexican? Would you? Would you?"

The clerk says, "Well, no!"

"If I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?"

"Well, I probably wouldn't!"

With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says, "Well then, why did, you ask me if I'm Polish just because I asked for Polish sausage?"

The clerk replies, "Because you're at Home Depot."

(for everyone outside America, Home Depot is a hardware store)

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